3azizi al Jagal

Bahdaltna eddem el ajenib!
Sou2al.. Aw majmou3et as2ila bel a7ra.. Shou bet 7ess lamma..

Social Media

• Tfout 3a profile picture benet w tektebla "No Comment"? Mesh jemltak hay bi 7add zeta comment? Shou hye ya toura el riseleh elli 3am tjarrib twassela? Hal enta akbar menn ennak fe3lian tektob comment bas ma 2dert tetmelak nafsak eddem jamela?
• Tfout 3a souret we7de lebseh a7mar w tektebla "lady in red".. Khaye eno Chris De Burgh 3imil hal ghenieh men shi 25 seneh w aktar.. ba3dak men wa2ta ma l2it shi ghayra? Law eltella "eza 7abibak tor lbeslo a7mar" kenit tol3it creative aktar mennak.. Aw ken 7abiba fa2a3ak atleh..
• Teb3at private message la we7deh (3a LinkedIn elli houwe shi lal business mafroud) w tektebla eno her smile dawakhetak wa ma ila hounalik, wel bent mortobta w mesh 3am tred 3lek fa bet sir tektebla WHY ARENT YOU ANSWERING MEEEEEEE? Eno bel mara bala dam?

3al tari2

• Tjib B.M. body ze3ran tsa22it 3laya moteeiir 545 ma3 tshipset w amassorat bolishtain [sic] w tkhammis fia eddem el sabaya? Kam douleb bta3mil bel tankeh 3ammo?
• Te2ta3 bi nafs el B.M. 3al corniche b ser3et 10 km/h enta w sa7bak el intikh mdawwrin Majeed el Reme7 3al 3aleh w mwatyin el shbebik w 3am tja2wro bel 3alam.. 3onsor terhib walla terghib hayda? I would say 3onsor la3yet nafess w iz3aj..
• Ykoun ma3ak ayya syiara eli kenit w bas tshouf we7de at3a tzammerla (w eza wesi2 men nafsak bet ella "tfaddale deimwaseil").. Bi sharafak man shi marra shedid we7de bhal tari2a? Eno eza ttalla3it fik badda tkoun fakkaretak chauffeur service..
• Tjib mosteek w t2ebb fi eddem el 7arim la yshoufo oudouratak bel al3ab el bahlawenieh.. 3am tet2ammal 7ada yekteshfak w y7ottak acrobat bshi cirque matalan?
• Tou2af 3a corniche el Manara/Marina Dbayeh/etc.. 3am tfa2e bezer aw termoss w kel ma te2ta3 we7de tet7efa bi jemleh bet nem 3an zake2ak el khari2 w rou7 el dou3abeh 3andak (a.k.a. latsheh) metel "fewwwwwwwwwww wlak ya raytne el ared la ted3aseh b albeh..
• Yeje 3a belak bnsas el layele te7ke ma3 7ada fa temro2 ta7t bayto w tesra3 el 3alam zmemir aw tef2a3o safra men laghaligh albak w t3ayetlo la eno ma ma3ak miss kol [sic].. 3afwan bass semi3 bel interphone?

Bein s7abak/Ma3 el ma7rousseh

• Yeje rfi2ak el intikh ma ghayro yeghlat w y3arrfak 3a sa7ebto el jdideh w t2ello 7abibi ya tayyibb shouuu mzabbat wad3ak ma3a?? Tab zabbetna ne7na kamen khayak ma bietla3lo? Eno bi sharafak..
• Tkoun a3id enta wel shabeb fettina da2 likha tle2e wa7ad 3am bi za3bir t2oum te2lob el tawla w tefta7 mashkal ma elo rabb.. Bravo 3lek kashaft el mou2amara el mou7akeh doddak, Scotland Yard talfanoulak al 3ayzin oudouratak el jabbara bel te72i2.. 
• Tkoun meshe enta wel ma7rousseh 3al tari2 yeje 3a belak tef2a3a bahdaleh edem kel shi fi 3alam kermel tbayenla rjoulitak.. Sadde2ne inna kaydahonna 3azim.. Wallah la t3abbdak el 3ejel wallah..
• Bas 7ada men s7abak ysebbellak emmak (ommak) t2oum tfajjmo, bas eza sabballak rabbak (elli enta ktir bet 7ebbo 3a ases) btekheda 3adeh.. Mesh mekhtelta 3leik el priorities shway?

Bel sheghel

• Tsir bani edam (bel esem bass).. Mabrouk! Sort teshteghil w 3allamouk testa3mil el email taba3 el sherke (mesh metl el hotmail).. 7aslo.. la shou mnesta3mlo hayda! La neb3at nekat of course! Aw lal shabibe el taybe mneb3atlon souwar neswein.. W akid akid eza baddak teb3at la sabab mnel asbeb allah la y2addir email sheghel w tetlob menno talab, t2akkad tkoun 7atit keeeel shi fi 3alam bel cc w tenshor el 7arim taba3o lal zalameh.. Lezim tfarji imto.. Ma32oul rasso?
• Te7ro2 sellefo lal computer teb3at wara el IT support w tetbello raso enno el computer kharben men warah houwe! Bas yeje la 3andak w y7ellellak meshkeltak w yfarjik adeh enta ghabeh, ello "HEHEHHE W BI OULO EL COMPUTER ZAKEH!!".. Kell eli khtara3o shi esmo computer bie3tezro men fakhamtak 3a hal ghalta!

Rou7 sir ensen w ta3a..

Shou dakhalak ana men wein?!

Ghlotet ana w tali3 3a Broumana liom w lafatle intibehe shi esmo Beit Misk..
Halla2 hayda el shi majmou3et vilal w montaja3 apparently, men b3id mbayan 3leh shaklo 7elo fa arrart eno rou7 shouf shou wad3o.. Mni7 la hon?
Meshyin hek 3al tari2 wa iz noufaja2 bi bawwebeh w 3onsor security men elli bi 7ebbon albkon. Hayda el security 3ando men nafso w mesik el amen men laghaligho!
Ana enno badde fout etfarraj shou fi fa sar the following conversation:
Me: Ya3tik el 3afieh m3allim dakhlak shou fi fo2 montaja3 syie7e?
Security Guy (SG): La2 fi vilal
Me: An walla fi lal ajar ya3ne challeyet walla lal bei3?
SG: La2 lal bei3 bass
Me: Tab fina nfout? Eza badde erja3 kif badde erja3?
SG: La2 estez mamnou3 tfout baddak tleff hon!
Me: Walla? Bet leff el sayyara hon dakhlak?
SG: Bass el akh men hon?
Me: La2 3am kazdir..
SG: Eh bas men wein ya3ne, Beirut..?
Me to my girlfriend but looking at him and smirking: Layke shou dakhalo ana men wein dakhlik?

I ignore him, make a u-turn, and drive away..

Disappointed Security Guard (Credit: Charles Fred)

W eiiiiiiis ma idir ya3rif ana men wein, kif baddo ykammil 7ayeto shab el security? Anyway el security hon wel amen mostatebb.

I really don't understand why people, especially jame3et el amniet men security la kouwa amen la jeish la ze3ran, have to ask you where you're from (implicitly what sect you belong to). Eno khaye ok wa2t el 7areb you needed to ask la tedba7o eza toli3 men gher tayfe bas halla2 SHOU KHASSAK TES2AL! Why do you assume that if i'm from 'the other' religion/sect I will blow everything up? Cheh!

Regardless of the blatant sectarianism still sadly rooted in this county, I would advise owners of projects such as Beit Misk to work more on their PR, people going in and watching is actually good advertisement, la shou bet 7awlo kel shi la mourabba3at amnieh! Walla zhe2na wein ma badde ebrom bhal balad ble2e bawebet 7adid w desham beton! W men samme 7alna balad syie7e?

P.S.: Shou osset el sayyarat bala nomra hal 2yiem?

عظمة على عظمة يا ست

كنت عم بتسحّر من يومين وإذ بقلب عا محطة حاطّة أم كلثوم..
أنا من يومين اكتشفت عن جد شو يعني الإنسان يسلطن مع إنو أنا بحب الموسيقى و بألف و بعزف وبغنّي عا قد حالي (وعا قدّ إلهامي).. الحاصلو، اول مرة هالقدّ بتمعّن بأم كلثوم هيّ وعم تغني. صدقوني السمع مش متل الشوفة.. مش غريب أبدا كيف كانت العالم تنطر كل ليلة خميس مناطرة لتسمع الست. أم كلثوم كانت هي وعم تغني، تغني الغنية - تتفاعل مع الكلمات، تضحك معها وتنفعل معها وتبكي معها - واللحن كان أصلا لابق على الكلمات. أم كلثوم كانت فعليا تحس الأغنية ومع ان صوتها جبار ما كانت تغني لتستعرض صوتها متل كل المطربين اليوم (راح ارجع للي مش مطربين) بل كانت تغني لأن بدها تغني.
للمقارنة عم جرب لاقي حدا بأيامنا عنده هل كمية التفاعل مع الأغنية.. مين جورج وسوف؟ كتير مابيحبو وكتير مغرمين في بس الاجماع إنه مؤدي ممتاز وأستاذ، يمكن أفضل مؤدي على الساحة بس برضه مش متل ام كلثوم.
الطرب ايام زمان كان كل واحد يغني لراسو. ماحدا ياخدها غلط بس لما ام كلتوم كانت تغني كنت تحس هي والملحن واللي كاتب الكلمات وحتى الجمهور ضاربين بانجو. هلق هني يمكن ماحدا منن ضارب شي بس الحب الحقيقي للكلمة والموسيقى كان الو نفس المفعول.. تصوروا هلق جمهور يسمع أغنية ساعة ساعة ونص وما يمل!

مطربين اليوم من وقت ما بلشت برامج الهواة متل سوبرستار حفظوا كلمة "عُرب" وصاروا كل ما دق الكوز بالجرة بدهن يستعملوا بين كل عربة وعربة، عربة. صار الطرب استعراض عضلات مش للاستمتاع. عندك العرب وعندك من بيقدر يطلع بالطبقات أعلى (آدم مثلا كل أغنية خلص الدمع تبعته ارتكزت على كلمة واحدة "وشفيت" يللي بخرق طبقة الأوزون فيها). أو متل معين شريف اللي أنا بحب صوتو كتير بس لطالما زعجتني في شغلة إنه بس يغني يده بتمشي مع صوته مش مع احساسه. يعني بس يطلع بالنوتة بيدلّ بأصبعه لفوق وهكذا دواليك. مان إنت منك قائد أوركسترا إنت مطرب! شغلة من الشغلات كمان إنو واحد بعدو طالع من برنامج هواة بعد 6 أشهر بـكونوا علموه سولفيج ومقامات شرقيه بيكون جايي عمقابلة بيصير يطلع بقائد الفرقة بـكل ثقة و بـيقلو "عطيني بيات الري وحياتك".. انو خيي فهمنا إنك pro مشينا!

هيدا بالنسبة للمطربين أما اللي مش مطربين فـحدث ولا حرج. بعدني من شي 3 سنين عم جرب اعرف شو يعني بطل شغل الحلبسة!
بعدين أنا هيفا أنا أو أنا دانا.. اهلين ربيع وهبي تشرفنا. أو بخصوص الالحان ال copy-paste من تركيا واليونان؟ يا خيي الاترك صاروا يحكوا سوري ونحنا بعدنا عم نسرقلهن الحانهن!

رح وقف نق لأنو مابعود اخلص بس راح اتركن مع مقارنة بين أم كلثوم و أمال ماهر مثلا ياللي هي تعد  من متخصصي أم كلثوم عم بـغنوا سيرة الحب وحكموا بأنفسكم الفرق بالأداء والتفاعل مع الكلمات.

ربنا يرحمك يا ست..

Tenzakar Ma Ten3ad

Alileh al el nashid el wataneh taba3na toli3 masrou2? Wlak al shou, Wadi3 Sabra staw7a men nashid Joumhoutiet el Rif elli m2allfo Mohamad Fleifel. Mni7 ahlieh bm7alieh tol3it, wa7ad Lebneneh shafit shi men wa7ad Lebneneh teneh wa ella kenna tbahdalna eddem el ajenib. Ma fi baynetna wluk ya zalame! Dakhlkon Mohamad Fleifel akid muslim bas Wadih Sabra, islem walla masi7ieh?
Bsara7a b7ayete ma kent shatir bhal gharizeh el lebnenieh el farideh men naw3a bi enno el wa7ad yestantij el tene shou dino, w shou aslo w shou faslo, w men wein, w jeddo ayya se3a ken you3a mnel nom bi moujarrad ma allo saba7 el kheir. Wlak sort estaghrib 7aleh eno leh ma bes2al el ensein awwal ma et3arraf 3leik houwe "men wein"? Al enno men laflefa badal ma nes2al el wa7ad shou tayefto, "Ento Wehbe men wein, bie2rabak flein?". El lebneneh 3atoul bi 7eb yel3aba bandou2a enno yaba ne7na fahmenin kel shi wel 3alam kella hebel. El 7amdella 100 marra enno ana esme jeye rekib wein ma kein, 3ala awlet wa7ad sa7beh bi 7 ayyar 2008 (a7ad fousoul mahrajenet el ma7abbeh ben el ekhweh) "Enta ya el tnein ma bi arrboulak, ya el tnein bie2tlouk".

Ma badde erja3 e7ke nafs elli 7kiton haydik el marra, bas tzakkaret hal ossa kella bi ma enno mberi7 keno 7attin el nashid el wataneh la enno liom 13 April yousadef al zekra al sadisa wal thalathin lindila3 al 7arb al ahlia al mash2ouma, 7arbou l2akharina 3ala ardina, mashrou3 al fitna al ta2ifia al imBBiriali (el P houwe 7arf imBBiriali bi 7ad zeto bas lal 3elem) li i7daath al sharkh bayna abna2i lwatani lwa7ed. Kif dallayna me2ten3in enno mesh ne7na elli dallayna 15 seneh n2abbir bi ba3ed is beyond me.

3a Hadir El Bosta

Ma fie oul yen3ad 3laykon bi zekra 7arb el 1975 la enno mafroud eno tenzakar w ma ten3ad, bas hye ma kholsit 3a fekra. Kel fekrkon eno ne7na 3ayshin bi 7alet salem? Abadan, it's just that the war has turned cold and that the sides have changed alliances (over and over and over for some) but the war never ended.
3ajabne 3a fekra shi3ar mberi7, "El bosta natretna 3al kou3"; mazbout natretna w ra7 t7ammil rekkeb eza badna nkammil hek.

There is a ray of hope however.

El shabeb el lebneneh elli ballash ywassil sawto lal te3bir 3an rafd hayda el nizam w haydol el douma el met7akkmin fina. El thawra bada2it ya asdika2e, w eza ballashna nnazzema aktar w aktar la tsir khotwet 3amalieh mesh bass 7arakeh i7tijejieh ra7 nousal nebne ma3 ba3ed Lebnen elli men 7ebbo. Lamma nousal eno kel wa7ad ye3bad inshalla el 7ajar bayno w ben 7alo, bas bi intime2o ykoun fe3lian 3ando watan w bi shouf el shakhs el tene bi ghad el nazar 3an mo3ta2ado el dineh men koun balashna el khotwe el oula na7wa bine2 watan. El watan ya jame3a b7ayeto ma bienhada 3ala taba2 men fodda, el watan ne7na mnesna3o bi 3ara2na w bi damna w bi a2lemna w bi 7anajerna. Ma badna ta2ifieh? Khallina nekhlas mena, ne7na eli men arrrir. Ne7na elli fina nsa22it el ta2ifeh lamma teje intikhabet w n2arrir nentekhib b3aks el anoun el ta2ifeh aw 7atta nenzal kellna n7ot war2a bayda w nsa2it el nizam. Ma badna ta2ifieh? Ne7na elli badna nelghia men nfousna W men nsousna (la ma 7ada y7arij ayya abel). Ma badna ta2ifieh? Badna neltezim enno ma ne7ke 7ake bass w bel ekhir bas wa7ad baddo wasta yerkod 3and za3im tayefto al eno el id eli ma fik laya bousa w ed3e 3laya bel kaser. La2! Ne7na lezim nesbot la hal mafia elli bi sammo 7alon rijel siese enno ne7na badna nebne shi metl el 3alam hal marra balehon w bala ashkelon elli bet la33e el nafes 3al television kel yom. Ne7na elli lezim na3tion 7ajmon el tabi3e w7otton matra7 ma lezim ykouno, mesh nkhalion bi maw2a3 kiedeh.

Tenzakar ma ten3ad, mesh bass el 7areb. El 3a2lieh elli sarit mehrieh w msaddeyeh tenzakar w ma ten3ad, el nizam (aw 3adam el nizam) yalli mouserrin ba3dna nemshe 3leh la enno "safe" aktar yenzakar w ma yen3ad, Lebnen el fawda wel atl wel ser2a wel damar yenzakar w ma yen3ad.

 P.S.:

1. Ktir b7eb el nashid el wataneh taba3na bas sar badna wa7ad jdid 3a hal khabrieh
2. Abou El Zelof is pro-secularism lal 3adem :)

I don't want this country.

3am bet2akhar la ektob ba3rif.
Badkon te3zrouneh because sometimes life takes you away from life.
Life.
How much do we have left of it? Here in Lebanon that is.
We have so much going around us these days it's hard not to think about our situation. Ok we are the party people w "yay jeye Armin" and "screw the bombs we will rise from under the ashes". But is that really true?
Ma 7ada menkon ya jame3a 7asis eno ne7na sha3b bey3ina w mesh 3am nfakkir ab3ad men menkharna? Why are we following the clowns that dare to call themselves polititians so blindly? El lezzeh wein, eno ne7na mnetghanna eno 3anna 7erieh b3aks kel el shou3oub el 3arabieh. Yet what are we doing with the so-called freedom that we have? We are taking the key and locking ourselves in. Lesh 3atoul badna njib el kharej la "yse3edna" w "yed3am masiret el isti2lel" w "yed3am el ma7kameh" w "yed3am khat el moukawameh". Sorry bas la jame3et 14 3an min mesta2ellin ne7na bel zabet? W min 3am n7akim? Jame3et 8, ne7na shou 3am n2awim bel zabet? Kello shi3arat fadyeh w ma ela ma3na w bel ekhir feytin bel 7eit!
Ne7na sorna mest2ellin 3an el 7ayet el tabi3ieh w mesh 3am n2awim ella 7alna!
Wloooh shou hal balad yalli we2if 3a arar zanneh yalli houwe sha2fet war2a! Ma32oul raskon?!
Let's wake up people and see what the real situation is, God knows how many billions of national debt, and a dysfuntional country that has been sitting on a powder keg for the last two centuries to the least.
Wlak how dare we consider ourselves to be intelligent while not revolting against this nonsense?
We have become vegetative persons who are programmed to watch politics and wait for the Beik, the Sheikh, the General, or the Sayed to speak so we know whether this week will pass without a civil war, all while partying ntebho!
Ta3o fakkro ma3e ya khaye aren't we acting like a bunch of idiots eno ya ba it's only a matter of time before civil strife takes place. Eno sheyfin el msibeh edemna w natrina tsir instead of preventing it. Why? Why have we become so lazy that we are willing to sacrifice our existence because.. Oh well it's happening anyway?
Do you even realize how stupid that is?
Wake the hell up why are they hearding us like that? Who said that I want to live in a country where i have to kill or get killed? And for whom? And for what?
"This is Lebanon, love it or leave it". NO! Who said that I should love it the way it is? And who said that I want to leave it? What about improving it? Has anyone given that a thought?
Leish ana badde ettar kel ma efta7 "Lebanon Files" efta7 men ba3da ra2san "Immigration Canada"?
I don't want to leave, but I don't want this country.
Kollouna lel watan?
3an jad?
Min kollouna?
Min ne7na?
W aya watan?
Khalina nettefi2 3a watan ba3den men sir kellna elo!
A French history teacher once told me "le Liban ne sera jamais un etat-patrie" (Lebanon well never be a homeland state), and I sadly believe this is the single truest statement I have ever heard about Lebanon. I had hoped at that time, some 12 years ago, that we would prove her wrong. To this day I fail to see us do that.
Well... Khallia 3a Allah, la2? Mneb2a men zabbeta 3a fadaweh..